Thursday, May 23, 2013

full flower moon

Dear ones,

As we approach this full moon and her eclipse, it seems to me more and more people are asking for more trust and deeper support in facing the unknown. The mystery makes us all want to hold a little tighter to something and yet what it wants the most is for us to completely let go. I notice that sometimes when I tell myself to let go, I still hold a secret hope that if I let go, I'll get the thing I want. Ha! Who am I fooling? I know that's just a silly dance performance. The song I keep finding myself whispering is "I don't know." Somehow it feels like a prayer: Please something, please universe, goddess, great mystery, please give me grace in the not knowing, please let me be wise like my grandma self and not do harm by trying to know things. In a world in which power is spellcrafted by people pretending to know things, not knowing feels like a sacred and powerful breaking of the spell. 

A FULL FLOWER MOON. and an eclipse to boot! what kind of magic can we make under that? Seems to me like that fullness and flowering time is the moment that is most clutchy- don't we want things to stay in that fat, blossoming, delicious place forever? Looking at the little pink petals all over the ground and the swollen, tight buds of the peony being gnawed at by the midwiving ants, I can't help but feel the letting go that lives in the blossoming. Someone recently told me about how every time something is hard and doesn't go her way, she says to herself, "it's practice for the Great Letting Go." And the full moon, herself, is a flower in full bloom about to experience loss. Every month she grows in shininess until she is full and then lets go of that light. Does the moon trust that the light will return? Has millions of years of these 28 day cycles taught her something? 

Life has probably always been uncertain for most beings for most times, but we're in a time of such immense environmental catastrophe, economic inequality, and despair for so many beings it's hard to keep trusting that our work will bring transformation and healing. How to do we keep on keeping on not knowing what might unfold?  I think about Assata, her freedom work, her life and here we are in 2013 with a new call out from the FBI for her capture. I think about all of us working towards freedom and more prisons being built. I think about the fight for marriage equality while queer homeless youth struggle daily, trying to get basic needs met. When these things pile up and we move into so much overwhelm, despair, and anger, what else can we do but cry, "I don't know."

 I don't know, but I sense that the breath of "I don't know" can be full of possibility. Maybe that exhale and drop of the petals lets the fruit take shape, and maybe we just keep moving, writing, making, dancing, talking, loving, crying, singing, breathing, living even in the ocean of uncertainty.

Here are some things I know:

We're making Queer Magic. I'm excited to be doing two workshops at the Trans* Health Conference, June 13- 15 in Philadelphia. On Friday June 14th at 4:05- 5:35 Jacoby Ballard and I will be teaching a TRANSNATURAL: holistic support for trans* folks and on Saturday, June 15th at 8:45- 10:05 I'll be teaching BETWEEN THE WORLDS: queer and trans* magic! For more info:

We will gather at The Witch Barn. I will be moving at the end of June to a tiny fairy cottage in Amherst, only 6 blocks from Emily Dickinson's homestead. I will be settling in and nesting from June 25- July 13th and back in the office Monday July 15th! Behind the tiny fairy cottage is big sunny barn which will be my office and also have classroom space. Beginning in August, I will start offering workshops, rituals, and retreats. more to come...but for now, the working name of the space is The Witch Barn. What do you think?

Beauty is everywhere. Since I am focusing more on my healing practice and teaching, I am thrilled to be hawking my wares at some special shops, run by people I love. If you want to get some Witches, Bitches and Hos or some charmed honey, please visit, in your body or astrally: Otherwild in Los Angeles (the town that raised me) or Homestead Apothecary in Oakland (the town that feels like home).

Welcome to the future, Dori Midnight. I am now scheduling online! makes it easy. Also, I have joined facebook. You can find me here:

We cast a spell for Assata
Artist, poet, and incredible being, Vanessa Huang has channeled a gorgeous linocut poem for Assata, who was added to the FBI's most wanted terrorists lists on May 2nd. Show some love and support for Assata and Vanessa by visiting her indiegogo page and donating or getting yourself a copy of this magical text.

My wish for you is that this full moon fills you up with so much brightness that every cell in your body remembers it's light, like millions of tiny moons inside of you.

with love,

1 comment:

stephen corona said...

The full flower moon is one of my favorite things to witness. I, too have felt a sense of "I don't know" and found that it is a sort of freedom. Thanks for your info on health conferences. I have found this apothecary in Phoenix, AZ to also be helpful.